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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29010987">but... i love you</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/blissfulbughead/pseuds/blissfulbughead'>blissfulbughead</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>potential &amp; missing season five bughead scenes [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Riverdale (TV 2017)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>5.02/5.03 scene, F/M, Missing Scene, betty feels guilty, bughead angst, bughead sadness, jughead's heart gets broken, mild mentions of smut</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 12:34:58</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,500</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29010987</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/blissfulbughead/pseuds/blissfulbughead</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>“But…” He searched for the right words, anything to make her take it back and say that they would get through this and come out better because of it. Instead, all that came to mind was the phrase he whispered to her every chance he got. The same phrase that he felt the need to remind her of, to let her be able to understand even a fraction of how deep his words really ran. <i>“I love you.”</i><br/>“I know you do, Jug. I love you too. So much,” Betty said with a small sob.<br/>“Then why? Why do you want to…” He couldn’t say it. He couldn’t admit to himself, let alone say it out loud, that she wanted this to end.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Betty Cooper &amp; Jughead Jones, Betty Cooper/Jughead Jones</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>potential &amp; missing season five bughead scenes [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/2170377</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>35</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>but... i love you</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Hello lovely humans! I started writing this late last night, thinking that we'd get the scene from the season five trailer in this week's episode, only to wake up this morning and find out that we'll have to wait until next week to see it :(<br/>But I'm posting this anyway and it's pretty much just my take on how I think this conversation will go. Also, something to take note of, is that I am going with the theory that Betty won't tell Jughead about the kiss with Archie right away. There was an article floating around that Archie will be the one to tell Jughead the truth, and I saw something else that suggested that he won't find out until after the time jump; but whatever it may be, he doesn't find out in this oneshot :)<br/>Also, I sort of rushed the ending so I'm not very proud of it, but I still hope you can find some sort of enjoyment from this!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Are we… going to be able to make this work?” Betty quietly questioned, almost too afraid to ask.<br/>
</p><p><i>Yes. Of course, we are.</i> He wanted to insist. But instead, the words got caught on his tongue, and all he could reply with was raising his gaze up to meet hers.<br/>
</p><p>Betty sensed this hesitation and moved closer to him until she was able to brush her fingers over his. “Jug,” She whispered, anchoring him back to her like she so often did.<br/>
</p><p>“I… I don’t know,” He finally spoke through an exhausted sigh. Because the truth was, he didn’t. How could he? How could anyone be so sure of such a vast lifestyle change like this? It was scary, admitting for the first time in their almost three years of being together that he didn’t know where the future would take them, but he couldn’t lie and say that they’d get through it. He couldn’t do that to himself or to her.<br/>
</p><p>After the words left his mouth, Jughead saw that Betty’s bottom lip started to tremble like it usually when she was on the verge of spiraling. In one swift movement, he pulled her against him and hugged her from behind. “But we can try, Betts. It’ll be hard at times, but if we just-”<br/>
</p><p>“No.” The word surprised him, but what surprised him, even more, was how sure she sounded when she said it. Jughead watched her as she moved away from his embrace to sit across from him, silently urging her to explain.<br/>
</p><p>Betty swallowed once before doing as he wished. “I don’t want to put us through that, Jug,” She said.<br/>
</p><p>“I-I don’t understand what you mean,” He stammered. “We’ve been through so much together. Sure long distance can be daunting, but anything’s better than having to be dead for two weeks right?” Jughead tried to crack a lighthearted joke, but when he saw Betty’s eyes slowly meeting his, her mind already made up, it seemed, he felt something inside him snap. “Betty?” He whispered, needing her to confirm that maybe she was just scared and worried like he was, certainly not sure of the fact that this was the one mountain they wouldn’t be able to climb.<br/>
</p><p>She was silent, not giving him any sort of peace of mind. Jughead reached for her hand and brought it to his lips, placing a kiss on her palm first then the back of her hand. “Talk to me, Betts,” He urged with a whisper.<br/>
</p><p>“Juggie, I…” The nickname she used to use for him more often than not, fell short along with whatever she was going to say next. Instead, her eyes just searched his, the hope that had once been there, now starting to fade.<br/>
</p><p>“I love you,” He whispered, wishing that maybe she just needed to be reminded of that. Maybe once she knew how much he loved her, she’d start to understand how much he needed this to withstand their college years. “I love you, Betty, please say something.”<br/>
</p><p>“This just seems like it’s a fight we aren’t going to win,” She finally said after a moment, her voice breaking mid-sentence.<br/>
</p><p>“But you don’t know that.”<br/>
</p><p>“And you don’t know that we’ll get through it either.”<br/>
</p><p>The harsh tone of her voice stung him more than he’d like to admit. “You’re right, I don’t, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t worth fighting for.” Betty looked down at her lap as tears fell from her emerald eyes. Jughead thought she’d have something to say to that, at the very least, but her silence hurt him more than any words ever could. “Do you… do you not think so?”<br/>
</p><p>“I don’t know, Jug,” She cried. “I don’t want to get hurt. Or hurt you. And I think that maybe if we… ended things… before we left for college then it would hurt us both less.”<br/>
</p><p>The truth of what Betty had said felt like he was suddenly being crushed by the weight of a whole city’s worth of buildings. Jughead slumped back against the headboard, clutching a hand to his shirt right over where his heart would be if it hadn’t been ripped right out of his chest.<br/>
</p><p>“But…” He searched for the right words, anything to make her take it back and say that they would get through this and come out better because of it. Instead, all that came to mind was the phrase he whispered to her every chance he got. The same phrase that he felt the need to remind her of, to let her be able to understand even a fraction of how deep his words really ran. “I love you.”<br/>
</p><p>“I know you do, Jug. I love you too. So much,” Betty said with a small sob.<br/>
</p><p>“Then why? Why do you want to…” He couldn’t say it. He couldn’t admit to himself, let alone say it out loud, that she wanted this to end.<br/>
</p><p>“Jug, you have to understand where I’m coming from,” Betty insisted while reaching out to place her hand over his. “I’m just trying to do what’s best for us in the long run.”<br/>
</p><p>Jughead met her gaze and searched for something in the dark green pools of her eyes, not knowing what. Did Betty not understand that she was his long run? He didn’t see an ending in their story and certainly not one this soon. He thought that she shared those views, but now…<br/>
</p><p>
  <i>Now he wasn’t sure what to think anymore.</i><br/>
</p><p>“I love you,” He said again with a weaker voice than the last. Jughead thought that maybe if he said it enough times, then this would all start to make sense. To him, to Betty, he didn’t know, but he just needed it to make <i>sense.</i><br/>
</p><p>“I know,” Betty whispered.<br/>
</p><p>“Please,” He started, barely able to get the word out. “Please just let me show you how much I love you.”<br/>
</p><p>Jughead reached for her, needing her close to him, but even with her sitting in his lap and their lips moving over each other in unison, it still wasn’t enough. Betty must have felt this way too because she pulled away for only a moment so she could rid herself of the flimsy t-shirt she had been planning to wear to bed that night.<br/>
</p><p>The shirt was barely over her head before Jughead was kissing her again while pulling her fully down on top of him and using one hand to unclip her bra, a skill he’s mastered over the years.<br/>
He kissed her as if his life depended on it and right now, it sure as hell felt like it did. Maybe he’d wake up the next morning and this would all be some terrible, unrealistic nightmare that had haunted him the night before. But with each kiss he left on her neck, he felt reality set in, moment by moment.<br/>
</p><p>Betty was crying, he knew that. Her whole body shook and a trail of tears lined her cheeks, no matter how many times Jughead pressed his lips to her skin to wipe them away.<br/>
</p><p>He thought that he might have been crying too, but he couldn’t tell. Right now, Jughead’s focus was on making Betty understand how deep his love for her ran. Once she knew that, then she wouldn’t want this to be over. She’d understand that he saw a future for them that withstood the tragedies of Riverdale.<br/>
</p><p>“I love you,” He said for what felt like the billionth time that night and he would say it a billion more if he had to.<br/>
</p><p>“Jug,” She whispered, grasping at his raven-colored hair that had been freed from his beanie from what felt like decades ago.<br/>
</p><p>“Please, Betty,” He begged. “Please don’t leave me like everyone else did.” The thought hadn’t even crossed Jughead’s mind until the words left his mouth. Everyone else in his life at some point or another had left him. Except for Betty. She had always been a constant in his life, his anchor, even when they had been broken up for a short time all those years ago. A small part of him figured that if this really was the end, then maybe she’d still be a part of his life, still there for him when he needed someone he could trust to fall back on. But the rational part of him knew that this time it would be different. If this was it, then that meant they’d say goodbye to each other for good and go their separate ways. Jughead couldn’t bear the thought of it.<br/>
</p><p>Betty didn’t say anything and the only way that Jughead knew she had at least registered what he had said was when she pressed a kiss to his mouth, squeezing her eyes shut tight as tears made their way down her cheeks.<br/>
</p><p>He pulled back and dug his face into the crook of her neck, letting his lips trail over her skin while he hugged her body close to his. “I love you,” He repeated. This time he needed her to say it back. He needed to be reassured that even if she was ready to pack her bags and move out before the sun even rose tomorrow morning, that at least part of her still loved him.<br/>
</p><p>“I love you too,” Betty whispered back, as if to read his mind.<br/>
</p><p>Jughead couldn’t help but sigh of relief at hearing those words leave her mouth. With everything that she had said that night, it was relieving to hear her say the phrase that he had always been so sure of. He loved her, and she loved him. Of course, she did. But why did it feel like a promise she was breaking? The tone of her voice made it sound as if it would be one of the last times she’d ever say it to him.<br/>
</p><p>That thought stayed stuck in the back of his mind for the remainder of the night like a piece of gum under a table. Even while he lay awake beside her, Jughead couldn’t rid himself of his worry. So much so, that his arms were wrapped tightly around her waist, too afraid that if he fell asleep, he’d wake up and she’d be gone.<br/>
</p><p>Betty had fallen asleep long before then and it wasn’t until he heard the steady sound of her breathing as her chest rose and fell, that he let himself shed the tears that had been building up all night.<br/>
</p><p>He wasn’t sure how long he had been crying, but when he saw that sunlight was starting to stream through the windows, he knew that there’d be no use in trying to sleep.<br/>
Jughead silently debated if he should exit the room before she woke up or stay right where he was, hoping that maybe there was a chance that Betty had changed her mind. Maybe delirium had gotten the best of her and she really didn’t know what she was saying when she had insinuated that she wanted them to part ways. Maybe she’d wake up and apologize profusely for ever suggesting that she’d want anything different for their future than he did.<br/>
</p><p>Jughead hated that he was thinking that way and not even giving a second thought to how Betty must be feeling, but he was just overwhelmed with the need to do everything in his power not to lose her.<br/>
</p><p>He hadn’t even registered what he was doing until he was halfway down the staircase with his shirt thrown lazily over his head. One second, Jughead couldn’t imagine ever letting her go and the next, he wanted to be as far away from her as possible so he could think about last night’s events without having her sleeping figure lay beside him, throwing him off course.<br/>
</p><p>He started pacing back and forth in the living room, his fingers intertwining with his hair. Jughead wished that he had grabbed his beanie off his nightstand, it being the only thing left that gave him a sense of stability.<br/>
</p><p>He thought he heard someone calling his name, but he brushed it aside as he continued pacing while the thoughts in his mind tore him into two. It wasn’t until his dad’s hand was firmly planted on his shoulder that Jughead’s hearing finally cleared and he was able to make out the sound of his dad’s voice. “Jug? What happened?” FP questioned, worry filling his brown eyes.<br/>
</p><p>“It’s-she,” He stumbled over the words, not knowing how to form a coherent sentence, let alone explaining to his father the conversation he and Betty had the previous night.<br/>
</p><p>“It’s okay, Jug. Just breathe,” FP soothed. “Here, come sit down.” Once the two men were seated and Jughead’s breathing had started to slow, FP questioned him again. “What happened?”<br/>
</p><p>“I think that… I think it’s over,” He finally said.<br/>
</p><p>“What is?”<br/>
</p><p>“Me and Betty.”<br/>
</p><p>“Oh.” FP sighed and wrapped his arm around his son’s shoulders. “I’m so sorry, Jug.”<br/>
</p><p>“She said that… she thinks it’ll hurt less if we end things before college, but-” Jughead scoffed. “I don’t know, dad, I gotta say that it hurts pretty fucking bad right now.” He looked up at the oldest Jones before continuing. “This whole time, I thought that we wanted the same things for us, for our future, but I guess one of us saw an ending while the other… didn’t.”<br/>
</p><p>FP didn’t say anything, but just gave his son a hug, knowing that he needed it more than anything right now.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>He could barely bring himself to look up at her as she came down the stairwell and into the living room. Betty stopped at the foot of the stairs and gazed at him for a moment before silently heading in the direction of the kitchen.<br/>
</p><p>Jughead sighed and leaned back into the couch, his eyes closed and hands over his face. This was killing him.<br/>
</p><p>For the first time since he’s been back from the whole Stonewall incident, he didn’t kiss her good morning or even say the words good morning to her when not even twenty four hours ago, everything had been normal.<br/>
</p><p>Jughead avoided the kitchen as Betty ate breakfast since he had already ransacked the fridge for something to eat earlier that morning.<br/>
</p><p>Jellybean was next to enter the living room and she greeted her brother with a smile. “Good morning, Jug.”<br/>
</p><p>“Morning,” He mumbled in response while keeping his focus set on the book in his hands even though he was pretty sure he had read the same sentence at least seven times, but didn’t have any clue what it said.<br/>
</p><p>He heard his sister and his girlfriend (ex-girlfriend? God, he didn’t even want to think about those words being associated with Betty) exchange a few words before Betty made her way back up stairs without even giving him a second glance.<br/>
</p><p>“Is she okay?” Jellybean asked as she stood in the entryway.<br/>
</p><p>“Uh… I don’t know, to be honest,” Jughead answered before closing the cover of his book and setting it aside. He stood and grabbed the keys to his motorcycle off of a table in the hall before looking over at his sister who had a very confused expression on her face. “If dad asks, tell him that I went for a drive, okay?” He didn’t wait for her reply before turning towards the front door.<br/>
</p><p>“Jug-” She started to call, but he was already gone.</p><p> </p><p>The sun had long ago been set and Jughead still wasn’t home. FP had texted him around four to see if he’d be home for dinner, but Jughead just replied with a simple no. The older Jones understood that his son needed space, but he couldn’t help but be worried about him. He knew that it wouldn’t be long before Jughead started to slip back to his old self, pushing anyone and everyone away so he was completely isolated. That wouldn’t do him any good, especially since he’d be going to a brand new environment that’s miles away from home without the comfort of his family and friends. And now, Betty.<br/>
</p><p>She had been quiet all day, mostly up in her room and only coming down for dinner and to get a bag of chips around one before returning back to her sheltered space. Alice had known that something was up when she had asked her daughter where Jughead was, with the only answer from the blonde being a small shrug.<br/>
</p><p>“Is something going on with them?” Alice asked FP once Betty left the kitchen after dinner to go back upstairs.<br/>
</p><p>FP sighed and nodded. “I would try to talk to her, Alice,” Was all that he would say before taking his plate to the sink.<br/>
</p><p>So that’s just what she did.<br/>
</p><p>Alice knocked on the door a few times. There wasn’t a response except for some sniffling and the sound of a tissue being ripped from it’s package. “Betty?” Alice called.<br/>
</p><p>“Come in,” Her daughter’s muffled voice said after a moment.<br/>
</p><p>When Alice stepped inside, she saw Betty sitting with her legs tucked under her chin and her back against the headboard. At her feet were an array of all the pictures she had of her and Jughead, along with a few notes he had written for her on special occasions. Tears stained her cheeks, her skin was blotchy, her eyes were red. She looked like a mess.<br/>
</p><p>“Oh, Betty,” Alice whispered before sitting down beside her daughter and pulling her into a hug. Betty started to cry into her shoulder as Alice ran a hand through her hair in a soothing manor. “What happened, honey?”<br/>
</p><p>“We broke up, mom,” She sobbed. “And it’s all my fault.”<br/>
</p><p>“I’m sure that’s not true, Betty,” Alice reassured, but Betty released herself from her mom’s embrace to look at her.<br/>
</p><p>“It is,” She said sternly before sighing. “I told him that… I don’t think we’d be able to make long distance work, but the truth is, I did something that I know if I told him, he’d never speak to me again.”<br/>
</p><p>“What could you have possibly done that would make Jughead of all people not speak to you?”<br/>
</p><p>“Archie and I kissed,” Betty admitted. “It was right after Jug and I had a fight and I was scared and I felt like everything was changing and I just needed something to ground me and make me feel like I wouldn’t be losing my life as I know it. And I know, I know now, that going to Archie was the absolute worse thing I could do, but we both got caught up in the moment and we kissed.” She wiped a few tears from her cheeks before she continued, “I’ve never regretted anything more. And we both agreed to never tell Jughead and Veronica, but I don’t know, mom, I just feel so guilty all of the time.” Alice sat silently beside her daughter, just rubbing a soft circle on her back. “But I can’t bring myself to tell him, I can’t. It would <i>destroy</i> him. So I took the easy way out and made something up that would be enough to push him away, but not enough for him to hate me.” Betty’s lip trembled before leaning her head back into Alice’s shoulder. “God, I’m such a coward.”<br/>
</p><p>“You’re not a coward, Elizabeth,” Alice replied. “You’re just a teenage girl who’s feelings got the best of her and you don’t want your mistake to hurt the boy that you love.”<br/>
</p><p>“But it isn’t fair to him that he doesn’t know,” Betty cried. “He deserves to know the truth and I’m planning on telling him eventually, but…” The blonde let out an exhausted sigh. “I’ve hurt him enough.”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Jughead returned home late into the night. He was planning on falling asleep on the pullout couch in the basement, but the sofa in the living room was much closer. What he really wanted was to make his way upstairs and crawl back into bed with Betty, just like he had left her this morning and act as if the previous night's events had never happened. And he almost did, but the rational part of his brain kicked in. He laid back against the sofa, keeping his eyes planted on the ceiling overhead.<br/>
</p><p>Were they broken up? He wasn’t sure. Or maybe he was, but too afraid to admit it to himself. He knew that another conversation would soon take place where he would have to lose her for good. But for now, he would let his mind wander to a better time.<br/>
</p><p>A time where his heart wasn’t filled with an unbearable amount of pain and sorrow.<br/>
</p><p>A time where the only worry coursing through his thoughts was if he had used enough mouthwash that morning. And that he wouldn’t fall off the ladder as he climbed up to her window.<br/>
</p><p><i>Hey there, Juliet,</i> he had greeted.<br/>
</p><p>A better time, indeed.</p>
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